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Sharing the adventure of going through life with someone you love is a blessing, but it can also be challenging, especially for young couples.
No matter how long you’ve been together or how old you are, marriage is going to have its up and downs – from spending your nights curled up enjoying each others company to fighting over something as silly as forgetting to put the cap back on the toothpaste.
From staggering divorce rates to early teen marriage leading to future poverty, the studies on young marriage don’t inspire confidence in newly married couples. But it’s important to know that you can make your marriage a success so long as you put your spouse and your relationship first in your lives.
If you’re looking for marriage advice, you’ve come to the right place. Whether you’ve been married for years or are a young newlywed couple, we’re giving you five tips for a happy marriage.
As the saying goes: If you’re not growing together, you’re growing apart.
While all humans continue to learn, change, and progress in knowledge, it is estimated that the brain does not fully finish developing until the age of 25. If you are married young, this makes it all the more important to look for ways to spend more time growing together as a couple.
Some couples choose to take up bonding hobbies together. Not only is learning a new dance, sport, or language together fun, it is also a great way to lean on each other for support.
Another great piece of marriage advice is to have a regular date night at least every other week with your spouse.
Having a weekly date night is beneficial for several reasons. First, it shows your partner that they are important to you. Even when tried after a long work week, you want to devote your time, attention, and affections to your marriage. Second, it builds emotional intimacy and gives couples a chance to talk and romance one another. Third, it reduces stress and anxiety.
What would you do if there was a blackout and all you had for company was your spouse? Hopefully, you would view it as an exciting opportunity to have fun and bond with your best friend and marriage partner and not feel like you were mourning your smartphone.
One way you can strengthen your new marriage as a young couple is to give each other your undivided attention. This may be difficult at first, given many younger people’s dependency on their smartphones, but by showing your partner there is nothing more important than their company you are building respect and promoting communication.
Even with busy schedules, couples should strive to spend at least one hour each day talking to one another without any electronics or smart devices turned on. This important time you spend together meditating, laughing, and strengthening your marriage.
One great piece of marriage advice that is important for young couples is to learn how to problem-solve together. This is commonly taught in marriage preparation and counseling.
Proverbs 12:18 from the Bible reminds couples of the importance of watching their words when it says: “Thoughtless speech is like the stabs of a sword, but the tongue of the wise is a healing.”
Even in the most wonderful relationship, you’re going to have disagreements. And it’s easy to get wrapped up in emotions when you’re having a heated argument, but don’t let a difference of opinion cause you to verbally attack or berate your partner.
Always bear in mind that, as frustrated as you are now, this was the person you chose to spend the rest of your life with. You are on the same team.
You can show your partner you love and respect them by not interrupting when they are speaking and trying to see things from their perspective during a disagreement. If you cannot come to an agreement, look for ways to cooperate and compromise.
Remember, you want to solve the problem together as a unit, not separately as enemies.
One great way to ensure your marriage is going to be happy and healthy as a young couple is to make a plan for the future during your marriage preparations.
For example, what is your family plan? Discuss such topics as when you would like to start a family, how you will go about preventing pregnancy, and how you will financially support your future children.
Another great avenue for planning ahead is to discuss how you will handle your finances. Discuss who will pay which bills, whether you will both work full time, have shared bank accounts, and how you will budget, spend, and save.
The threefold cord of yourself, your spouse, and God is the tightest bond any married couple can make. In fact, studies confirm that religious couples are happier than those without faith. Therefore, it’s important to include God in your marriage and strive to follow His principles.
What does the Bible say regarding Christian couples?
The scriptures mention that a man is to treat his wife like his own body and that a woman is to show deep respect for her husband. It says that the two are to stick together as “one flesh,” and that God “hates divorce” (Malachi 2:16).
Having a weekly worship night together as a couple is another great way to draw closer to each other and to God. You could take turns reading Bible chapters to one another or you could look up married couples from the Bible and use their love stories as examples for your own marriage.
When you’re newly married, it seems like everyone has an opinion on what will make your relationship stand the test of time. In the end, the best marriage preparation for young couples is to communicate regularly, make time for each other, learn to problem solve and get to know each other’s expectations.
Faithfully Magazine is a news and culture publication centered on Christian communities of color.
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